So how did it all happen?

Well, it certainly wasn’t the plan for either of us to fall in love.  As I said at the end of my last post about this, I had stated over and over again that this was just companionship.  But the affection was there from day one.  He was always so loving and kind.  And I love to snuggle and cuddle and kiss and hug.  And he was willing to do that.  Always.

One of the complaints that I hear from women all of the time is that their men don’t think about them when they’re out shopping.  I explain, this is just how men are wired – they go shopping for something, they don’t browse around and see if there is something someone else would like.  They go in and get what they need and get out. Heck, I’m the same way.

But not The Veteran.  Every time I would come on Fridays, there was something he had seen while out and about and thought of me.  And that was so endearing to me.  It always made me smile.  Then the gifts became larger – the new bedding for the bed we shared and finally, the new bed itself.  And while I was praising him for the new bed, I missed the flowers he had placed on the shelf above it.  And he told me last night, that was the most open he had been about his feelings, for fear that I would run.

His home is a vacation for me each week, a spa even.  He cooks for me, he does my laundry, he makes sure that I am happy – that’s all he asks for is that I’m happy.  He isn’t afraid to show me his gentle side, but there is such a wonderful manliness about him as well.

And so, we were so close and happy yesterday, I could tell that there was something going on.  So, I finally said, you know, this is more than companionship.  He said, yes, you are right.  I said, you know, I so respect your relationship with your late wife, I don’t think that she would mind you caring about me, although I know it would not be the love that you had for her – that’s an irreplaceable love.  She was the love of your life.  He said, I know.

I said, because I think you love me.  He said, you do?  I said, yes.  He was quiet for a moment and said, but you didn’t want that.  I said, I know, that’s what I said and I meant it back then.  He said, well, I do love you.  I said, and I love you and it’s okay that it’s love and not in love.  He said, no, I am in love with you.  Not just a little, but a lot.  And I’ve been afraid to tell you because I figured you would leave and never come back.

It was so beautiful.  So kind and gentle. He was so scared.  And I said, well, I have fallen in love with you as well.  And we talked about when we thought it had started.  And we both realized it was after the whole thing about his age.  He said, I would be lost without you and I thought I had lost you.  And I said, I couldn’t walk away, it was going to be too hard.

He started to cry and I held him.  He said it was a weight off of him to finally tell me.  He said that was why he had not wanted to have me here during the week, because he didn’t want to encourage his own feelings when I had said that I didn’t want anything more than companionship.  So, he kept saying that he was too busy to see me during the week – although, we did start seeing each other once during the week because it was so hard to go from Sunday to Friday without seeing each other.

So, now that we’ve admitted it, we can’t stop saying it to each other.  Today, I took a nap while he was making us lunch.  And he kept coming in and kissing me, telling me that he loved me.  It’s a very sweet, romantic time for us.

His main concern is our age difference.  I said, we can’t change that – I can’t get older faster (nor do I want to, lol) and you can’t get younger.  Let’s just enjoy the gift we have received – the gift of each other – for as long as it lasts.  I am not asking for a commitment, I am not asking to move in, I am not ever going to ask you to stop wearing the wedding ring you have from your marriage to your late wife.  I simply just want us to enjoy the time we have.

I don’t know how long this will last – not looking beyond this week.  I just know how I feel and how he feels and it’s pretty great.  He says I am glowing from happiness.  He is too.

I am off to go look up some information on Old Man Cave Chalets.  We’re planning a trip there.